Years ago a man in our spiritual community asked me this questions, “In a relationship when something goes wrong why does the woman blame herself and the man blame the woman?” I didn’t have an answer, but I knew that his question was valid.

We are all alive in our bodies, but not as alive or as free as we might be. We each contain within us the entire spark of life, a power of Earth aliveness that is magnificent. And we hold ourselves back. Both the masculine and the feminine within creation do this, but in very different ways. We all want to fit in, to be loved. As women, we have learned from hundreds of years of experience that we will not fit in or be loved if we are too loud, too forceful, too powerful. We have been called names meant to wound and dehumanize us when we step over this invisible line our culture has drawn. We have learned to go quiet and to quickly blame ourselves if disharmony arises so that we aren’t further abused. . We have learned that silence and self-blame can diffuse these situations.

We tell our little boys to be strong, be brave, to not cry, to be a man, to not act like a girl. These boys grow up but they have had to disown the tenderness and compassion that also belong to them. They suppress their emotions, all except a few. They are allowed to get angry when they feel emotions are involved or if they see something that does not fit within the lines that have been drawn.There have been some interesting ways in which women are standing up to abuse in the past few days. Women are no longer being silent and are stepping forward to say, “This is not acceptable.” We are finished with being silent, with feeling we have to accept what comes at us. We are learning to say ‘No, that is enough!”

I am so proud of Representative Alexandria Ocasio – Cortez for standing up to the verbal abuse toward women in our culture from the floor of the House of Representatives. In case you haven’t seen her, this is the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LI4ueUtkRQ0

We have been silent in the face of abuse for much too long. It is time to change the story. Until we reclaim the balance so needed in our world, none of us will be whole or see ourselves and indeed all of life as sacred.So what is the first step? We need to watch and listen, to begin to see how we keep ourselves silent by a critical inner voice that makes us small and fearful. It is time to speak back to it, to thank it for sharing and to say ‘Enough.” May we end the internal abuse we all suffer from. It is time to stand firm within our true center, setting new boundaries that encourage all of us to thrive. And so it is.

It is so important today to honor the one that we have been to this point in time. Yes, changes are coming, perhaps changes that could not have been made before, changes that we have been longing for. And we judge the time it has taken us to learn, but do we judge a baby for not being able to drive a car? We have been so hard on ourselves for not getting it, not being all that we could be, but perhaps we have done the best we could with what we knew at the time.

When we reject the beautiful one we have been, we also push away the amazing one we can become. The question is, can I embrace the amazing human drama with all its messy splendor? Let’s just open to allow ourselves to become all we are meant to be without any judgment.

We had an interesting healing session with Rob last night. He mentioned something I had not thought of, which is healing and releasing trauma seven generations into the future. Such an interesting suggestion! This seems especially good now as we are just doing the work and many children and perhaps even grandchildren have been born into our lineage. Perhaps these are not directly from our own bodies, but from our brothers and sisters and cousins and so many others.

Today I am sending a healing out to seven future generations of my family, many of these are not known to me having come from a branch that perhaps never left the home country and yet we can have a broader healing impact by clearing trauma for them.Today let us send out blessing to support the optimum healing and inherent thriving of all future generations that have been born or will be born into our lineages. May the resulting healing support the evolutionary shift of our planet into a loving home for all species.

We have moved into Leo today with the sun at 0 degrees. This sign gives inspiration to come from Love with every breath, to bless the world, to create something entirely new. We are all stepping into the unknown. May we move forward with generosity and joy. We have been thrown out of whatever illusion we had imagined about how the world is, how our life might proceed. So we have new choices to make now. We could choose to be more selfless and recognize that we are all connected. We could decide that nothing is truly personal. May we make beautiful and healthy choices.

A few tidbits from Matt Kahn’s weekend livestream:

Self acceptance is knowing I am the Divine learning about itself, however I act or behave. Remembering this shifts polarity. This doesn’t result in chaos as the ego would like us to believe, but helps us act from alignment with our Divine nature.

Be authentic – we don’t need to prove anything to ourselves.

What I learn is for me, not for others who may not be ready to hear what I learn.

People can only see my light as much as they can see their own.

What if rather than trying to attract things, we sat still and became the magnetism that attracts all the blessings and miracles for ourself and others.

Bless others to elevate the vibration of the planet.

Champion everyone’s expansion – cheer everyone on – bless them – life is an ongoing opportunity to enact the law of attraction for all sentient beings to evolve and thrive.

The world is at a catastrophic devastation of shifting into a new reality. We can offer blessings to help with the transition.

I give myself what I need, rather than what I want.

The sun is at 29 degrees Cancer today so we are saying goodbye to this sign. We have been around the sun to this degree many times before and it always reminds us of the forgotten treasure that we hold within our being.  Here we are called to be alive within the deep Mystery of the moment.  May we go deep today and drink with great thirst from the well of the Divine Feminine.    

A dialogue from the book Embers, One Ojibway’s Meditations by Richard Wagamese

Me:  I miss my mother sometimes.  Really bad.

Old Woman:  Maybe try missing her really well.

Me:  How do I do that?

Old lWoman:  See that sunrise?  See how beautiful the colours are?  How clear and clean the air feels?  How good it feels inside of you?

Me:  Yes.  It’s wonderful.

Old Woman:  She lives in that.  So maybe just say, “Thanks, Mom: when you see and feel things like that.

…..

I miss my mother really well now.

May we all miss our mothers really well!

Cancer #27 & #28

Hello, beloved;  I didn’t manage to write yesterday.  I felt so out of it, not exactly sick, but just low.  I had a few things that I absolutely needed to do and those things I managed, but I didn’t write for you.  Self care comes first now, for all of us!

Today is a very Cancer day,. sun, moon and Mercury in Cancer.  So the outer appearance, the emotional body and the mental body are in Cancer mode today.  Time to tend and nurture yourself, your family, your home, and your garden.  I have been out watering my garden here today.  The raspberries are ripening as well as the tomatoes.  We. Had our first zucchini from the garden this weekend.  I love this time of year in the garden.  

Things are changing, we are being called back into ourselves to see what we actually believe and who we truly are.   We have been used to merging with the old cultural pattern and now the polarities and turbulence in the are calling us to dive deeper, to find our own inner ways of being, our unique way of walking on our planet home.  It isn’t easy, we need lots of help.

A sweet friend asked me about prayer and I think my answer may be helpful to you, as well.

One of the things that I find helpful in prayer is to make it into a dialogue.  So, it is like this,  I am sending up an inquiry, like:

‘What is my next step regarding……  or please give me guidance about……..  Then I listen for an answer.  This might come right away as a knowing or even words that come into your mind or heart.  It might come as a dream or a vision.  I just keep watching until my inquiry is answered.  I make the request general, like show me the highest and best outcome regarding …….   and the steps to take to arrive at that outcome.  I don’t ask for specific ‘things’, usually, maybe because it is so hard to know if my intentions are coming from a place of clarity.  I ask for help, healing, grace, guidance, support, protection and leave it open as to how those things might arrive.  

If I don’t understand the guidance that comes, I just talk to God or the universe or the goddess or my own angel and tell them that I don’t understand and need more information.  In time prayer becomes like a conversation between you and the Divine. 

You might also begin a practice of asking for what you need from your family and friends.  

You deserve to have whatever you need to thrive.  The universe is abundant.  Ask!!!

If you are smudging and need focus, repeat an affirmation or mantra while you are doing it.  That will help you focus.  You might repeat something like:  purify and clear or with this smoke I call for the angels to scrub the energy in this house clean.  Whatever comes to mind.  I use this practice to clear my space:

Psychic vacuum cleaner

You will need:

Rubbing alcohol

Epsom salts

Aluminum foil

A small pan with a handle

A woody incense – cedar, sage, or sandalwood, etc.

Make a cup with the aluminum foil (about the size of a small teacup) and set it in the pan.  Put about 1 inch of epsom salt in the bottom of the cup and add the alcohol to just cover the salt.  Say a short prayer for guidance and protection and then carefully light the alcohol.  It will flare up, so light a strip of paper and drop it in.  * Be sure your smoke detectors are disconnected before you do this.

Start where you are and walk through your home slowly, letting the blue flame shine on each wall, inside of every cabinet and closet, cleansing the energy in your space, clearing out old emotional energy and thought forms.  You can repeat an affirmation or mantra as you do this.  Walk slowly through each room.  You may need to renew the epsom salts and alcohol if you live in a big space.  You can also walk once around the outside of your house with the flame still lit.  Dispose of the foil package immediately.

Light the incense and refill the spaces you have just cleared with the fragrance of freshness and renewal.

Repeat as needed.  During the times when you are working with clearing old patterns, you might wish to do this once a week.  The new moon is a good time to renew your home with clear energy.

It is also possible to use this method to strip off accumulated energy from your auric field.  Use your hands to strip the residue energy from your field, clearing a space  from just outside your physical body to a few inches around it and toss this energy into the burning epsom salt and alcohol.

This was something I did for years whenever returning home from work so as not to pollute my space with outside energy.  It is a good practice to do at the time of the New Moon to prepare your home for a new cycle.  Blessings.

Saturday – July 18th

Good morning, beloved;  Hope you are doing okay working with the intensity of the energy on the planet.  I talked to my son this morning and he said that he can feel the earth vibrating, not an earthquake, he says, but a tremor.  He is very sensitive to energy.  He says it is part of the process of moving into a new dimension.  We are standing on a precipice between the old world order and the new that is coming to birth through each of us.    It is a time that requires a leap into the unknown.  Can we jump?  Can we trust enough to fully let go of our past and our old belief systems and leap?  We have to break free of the old.  I am reminded of the Devil card in the tarot.  There is a man and a woman standing in front of the Devil.  They have chains around their necks.  It looks like they are trapped and yet the chains are loose and they could easily lift them off or duck down and escape.  We are not stuck.  We have a choice.  Let us choose freedom.

I am feeling slightly fuzzy mentally today.  Perhaps it is a part of what my son is talking about.  Seems like a good day to really relax into ourselves and honor what is occurring.  It would be good to stay in the present moment as much as possible.  These are intense times.  May we have the strength and courage to come through these days safely and with our faith in the goodness of life renewed.  May we walk through this day today remembering the miracle that we are.  Sending so much,  habiba

So, how are you feeling, beloved?    The beginning of the eclipse will happen just before noon in Denver, CO lasting until about 3 pm.  It is not visable from America, but can certainly be felt.

Personally I am feeling quite intense energy in my head and upper body.  I have a candle burinng that contains three angelic blessings, Violet Flame, Sacred Clearing and Sacred Shield.  I always feel more centered when this candle is burning.  It is a powerful resource.  

So let’s open to the changes offered by this powerful lunar eclipse.  Change is needed on Earth.  I am ust imagining what the energy must look like.  The Moon is opposite the sun, a full moon and usually it would be at its maximum light, totally receptive to the Light of the sun.  Today the shadow of Earth touches the moon and thus we have an eclipse.  So could it be that internally our emotional body is at its most receptive to the Light of our being and the shadow images that we have held, the stories we have told ourselves in the past could be received and illuminated more easily during this time by our surrendered emotional body which is filled with Light?  Just letting my Gemini imagination run here.  

Many blessings on your day.  Be safe.  

Tomorrow, June 5th 2020 we will experience the energy of a lunar eclipse with the sun at 15 degrees Gemini and the moon at 15 degrees Sagittarius. We might feel the current of this eclipse already in the scattered-ness of our thought process. I am certainly feeling it as I write this.During a lunar eclipse we might become aware of the influence of others on our life and experience. As the energy of the moon shifts and begins to be affected by the shadow of Earth, we might experience a mystical glow coming from this compassionate union allowing us to see people under a different light. We might begin to look at our fellow humans and see that we have far more in common that we have differences. This shift in perspective is critical for the evolution of our world.During lunar eclipses, we have an opportunity to let go of whatever is no longer serving our soul, what is no longer serving all parts of humanity, what is no longer serving creation. This is the time to release and say goodbye to old outdated ways of walking in the world.This eclipse will be more powerful for you if your moon nodes are in either Gemini or Sagittarius signs. However, if your nodes are elsewhere, things are still going to change: Planets are also activated by the eclipses. Planets in the mutable signs of Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius and Pisces will also be activated by the Gemini-Sagittarius eclipses. Regardless of which planets are in these four signs, you will feel the shifts inspired by these powerful energies. Open to the energy of this lunar event and see what changes it brings.This video is amazing – Wisdom Weavers invite a view from indigenous eyes. Enjoy.https://www.wisdomweavers.world/

Beloveds;  We are in a time that calls us to swift growth, evolvement and maturity.  Gemini has been preparing for this moment for ages.  The love of studying multiple subjects and reading what calls to us or jumps off the shelf into our hands has opened our mental doors to the possibility of bringing together a multiplicity of ideas and thoughts into something entirely new and amazing.  Mercury is the messenger of the Gods.  Let us listen.  

Today, let us focus on completing old business and moving into areas where something new might arise.  If we set our intention, if we focus, if we ask the right questions and if we open to the Mystery, then there is a possibility of birthing a new story.  So what might our intention be?  We might intend to combine our intelligence with our sense of practicality to generate a new awareness of how we might walk in the world as caretakers for Earth, as allies to every other part of creation, with our hearts open and with a willingness to stand strong for justice.  

Our world needs to change and our Gemini eyes see this at every turn.  May we start to hold open a basket to receive the seeds we have gathered in our many studies.  May we expand our inner world now to include our bodies, our homes, our relationships.  May we bring the Love that we know in our hearts out into our world, perhaps starting small, keeping it close so that we will feel safe.  

One of the weeds that needs to be cleared from our mind now is that we have to withdraw our unspoken permission from any abuse, misuse of power, force towards ourselves or another, and any other thing that prevents another or ourselves from having a fulfilling life.  In the third posting for Gemini,  I said “We can no longer hold to the ‘victim’ identity.  We are sovereign entities who have been given free will in order to choose what serves us and creation.  If we don’t speak up, even silently on the inner planes, we have given over our power to the cultural imprint.  We might say that it is time to decolonize our minds. “

May we begin to speak where it feels safe to do so.  May we go even a little past our comfort zome.  May we teach our children new ways of seeing the world.  I include this link from the Chicago Public schools on how to talk to your children and others about racism.  It is filled with links to resources so badly needed right now.  

Until we meet again, be safe, be well, be open to new ideas.  Know that you are loved and that you are Love.  Blessings.

Today the news is full of people, including police officers, sheriffs, police chiefs, and white women standing with those who are protesting racism in America, hugging them, walking with them, taking a knee in solidarity, or standing with linked arms between the peaceful protesters and the advancing police.  On the other hand we have those who are bent on stirring up violence, wanting to meet a protest of police violence with more violence.  

Inside those with Gemini strong in their chart there is this separation going on between our outer world and the inner world where we have been working to bring Love to all of our shadowy places.   We understand that this Love has to flow out into the outer world.  We know that it is needed now and yet we keep looking for an opening in the world, a place where all of our interior riches would be listened to and accepted.  Hopefully we have had strong protectors who stood between our tender interior and the intensity of the world – we have called on our teachers and guides, our angels, done ritual, used protection practices, done whatever we could to be safe.  Here is a protection practice that I use.  You might like it, too.

For Psychic Protection – (The back of the neck is considered to be Joe’s Diner for hungry ghosts and this protects you from being their feast.  It is especially good when entering hospitals, being around the elderly or going into a bar)

Make an upward pointing triangle using both thumbs and forefingers.

Blow Hu (Divine Essence) into it three times visualizing golden light filling it.

Keeping the triangle joined, move it over your head to the nape of your neck and visualize the light melting like golden butter into the back of your neck.  Do this whole procedure three times.

We have been waiting for a signal that the time is right to let our inner beauty and wisdom come forth.  We listen deeply for a signal, we watch the situation in our country wondering if the time has come.   Geminis understand that we need to replace outdated ways of thinking, old agreements and ways that we have been embedded in belief systems with something that uplifts humanity and fulfills our obligation to Earth.  Is it time to take a risk?  Are we strong enough to withstand the response that may be directed our way?   Perhaps.  Maybe the preparation can never be complete.  Let’s listen deeply and know that we are not alone.  Blessed be!