I feel good today, but just under the surface is my connection to the whole and sensing into that, I feel a tension, an unsteadiness, a sort of overwhelming desire to crumble into a heap. We have been through so much as a species, so much trauma.  We have all tried to cope in the ways we had been taught were the best or perhaps we sought something new, new ways to deal with our circumstances.  Some of us have tried to follow the rules, to be logical and rational and some of us have done our best to follow our heart.  The voices of logic and the rational have been very loud for hundreds of years on this planet.  

Our hearts have led us to strange places, places not well accepted by society.  We need to believe in ourselves, to trust that we are headed in the direction that will serve Truth, serve the Reality behind the storyline.  We must continue regardless of the most shocking downfalls that occur.  There is a great need to stay present in the midst of whatever madness is seemingly occurring.  

This weekend I was reading a book called, She Who Cannot Be Shamed, Tamed or Contained by Christena Cleveland.  I loved the ideas she shared in the book.  Here is a quote from one of the chapters.  It offers hope and help.  

“It was in this season of blurry identities that I went to meet the spectacular Black Madonna of Willesden, London who is worshipped by a predominantly-Black congregation. What immediately struck me about this Black Madonna is how firmly rooted She is. Situated in the Seat of Wisdom position that symbolizes stability, strength and power – she sits tall and unyielding. It’s as if she wants us to know that she is firmly planted on the ground, that there isn’t one part ofher body that is ungrounded or unstable. She is the personification of stability and predictability. Yet, her stability isn’t rigid or controlling. In fact, her posture is one of openness, generosity, and adventure. 

AND HER CHILD! Rather than passively lying in her arms, he is learning to stand independently, to learn to dig for his own deep roots. Rather than holding him back and manipulating him so that he forever stays under her control, She freely shares her deep-rooted strength with him, holding him up, and helping him strengthen the muscles he needs to dig for the deep roots and be free to navigate this uncertain, blurry world with openness and generosity rather than fear. She offers her stabilityto him, not as a drug to keep him hooked on her, but as a launching pad so he can courageously engage our uncertain world. Unlike whitemalegod’s shallow roots,

Her deep roots are deep, nourishing,and liberating. 

Though her official name is Our Lady of Willesden, I’ve nicknamed her She Who Steadies our Inner and Outer Worlds. After years of being controlled and restrained by whitemalegod, She holds us steady as we strengthen our ability to face uncertainty and learn to stand on our own.’

Beloveds;  We went to the mountains for the past two days and it was beautiful to have a change of scenery.  Loved being with the trees, wildflowers, ground squirrels and chipmunks.  Only about an hour from home, but really nice.  In some ways it felt like a new world was coming to birth.  As I feel into our experience, I find gratitude arising and a sense of joy and newness to life.  It is so important right now to be thankful for what we have, to be respectful of one another, to celebrate even small advances.

I was listening to a podcast a few days ago and heard this:  Humility is the willingness to be wrong about the way we see things, the way we believe things are.  In our society we have been wanting to win so badly, wanting to be ‘right’, that we have nearly forgotten that there is such a thing as ‘the truth’.  Today lets’ be humble and listen deeply to ourselves, to others and to nature to actually uncover the reality of what is.  The stakes are high.  We need to be out of the way now, stepping aside from the stories we have told and believed, in order to do the work necessary to go forward in a more beautiful and connected way.  May we be grateful and respectful and compassionate with every footstep and word today.  Peace.

Today I am intending to be still, to listen to my body, to offer it what it needs.  There is a sense of being crowded inside a skin that is much too small to hold the energy of my being.  I can feel deep within me the urge to break free, to escape.  I will sit with that, feeling into it, welcoming the pressure and the intensity from within.  I will know that as I do my own inner work, I do this work for everyone, for our species, for the world.  Let’s listen deeply to find our individual piece of this work.   There is a transformation going on.  The pressure is pushing our journey forward.  

It is necessary.  Together we can do this.  Big hugs.

Hmmm.  Seems to have gotten ahead of myself on the degrees of the Sun.  Lots of fire outside and Leo has lots of fire inside.  This seems to be the state of affairs in the world right now.  May all of the fire that is up to the surface of our lives be there so that it might be healed and released.  May we find a gentler way of walking on our beautiful planet, one that honors every being, a way that listens deeply to the needs of a vast diverse Earth community.  May we come to know our watershed, the land we dwell on, the ecosystem we live within.  May we honor and respect each being, knowing the beauty and amazing wonder of our interconnectivity.  May we listen deeply in each moment, learning how to proceed, leaning into the voice of the deep Earth and feeling Her connection to our deeply Embodied Presence.  May we move a step closer to the awesome unfolding of a united future, one breath at a time!  And so it is!

For so long we have been walking in the way of our culture, our families, our religions.  Deep within our heart we know that there is more, that we are more.  We are longing for the freedom to express that amazing one that we are freely and with joy and yet everywhere we turn, there seems to be something in the way, something that holds us back, internally or externally.  And yet the burning desire is there and it pushes us on.  Perhaps this is the energy we need to break through the shell of the egg we have been talking about.   We want to bring ourselves through, no matter the cost.

And it can be exhausting, so much to let go of, so much energy necessary to break through.  We have to trust in our body’s need during this process.  Today my body is rather tired and seems to be undergoing a release of some old toxins.  I will rest and drink lots of water.  I will listen to the need of my body.  I will say NO to anything that takes me away from what is needed.  Let’s listen to our body today and honor what it needs.  We have to trust the process.  We need to have patience.  We don’t have to do everything today.  Relax and rest deeply.  Blessings on your journey.  

What if it turns out that the crises, the challenges, the ordeals we are going through are the greatest of blessings.  We are traveling through a time of Mystery.  We have no idea what tomorrow may bring.  We know that we are not in control of the future.  What if we just relaxed and trusted that what comes to us is exactly what is necessary for our next step and decide not to resist it, but to celebrate its potential to clear the way for something miraculous.  If we forget and get entangled in outer circumstances, let’s just pick ourselves up and brush ourselves off and begin again.  Today let’s be grateful for the miracle of life.  What a journey we are on!  I am thankful to be alive during these amazing times.  

Sister Mariam McGillis from Genesis Farm in New Jersey has come to mind today and I am remembering a talk she gave years ago where she used a metaphor of considering that our species has been living inside an egg. We had everything needed to survive and grow. Now we have used up all the resources and it is time to hatch. We each, just like a baby chick, need to break our way free so that we have the strength to survive outside of the egg. The very effort of cracking through the egg makes us strong.

To break free we have to leave everything we were clinging to behind. This means even our beliefs about ourselves and any feeling of self-importance. We don’t know what life will be like outside of the shell. We are listening now. We are beginning to hear the sound of cracking and the joyful sound of others breaking free of the old limited way of living. We are gathering our strength, knowing that we have to just go for it. We cannot survive any longer inside these limitations. We are hearing voices from beyond, from Spirit urging us on. We are part now of an evolutionary movement. We can stay inside the egg and die for lack of nourishment, getting weaker and weaker as times goes on or we can break free. There is no proof that any of this is real or that there is even a possibility to break free of these limitations. The only thing that we can trust is the urging of our own soul. Mine is saying, “Let’s go for it.” See you on the other side!

Yesterday afternoon I felt something shift and a clarity arose that had been missing in the world for a very long time.  It wasn’t a clarity with words or any sort of information, just a very gentle glow to everything.    I felt relaxed and physical tension released somewhat.  I am wondering if anyone else felt this.  Today it still feels better than it has in a very long time.  

Summer Week 6 Tenderness 

“One regret, dear world, 

That I am determined not to have 

When I am lying on my deathbed is that

 I did not kiss you enough.” 

Daniel Ladinsky, I Heard God Laughing: Renderings of Hafiz 

Life has presented me with such a miracle of wildness.  I remember spending days with the Sufis and melting in Love, into the Beauty of it all.  A few years ago, we spent five days with our heart friends at Sunrise Ranch in Loveland, Colorado and then our Sheikha was in Boulder for a few days.  Such love, such deep sharing, such amazing transformation for all of us!  On another occasion, at our zikr in Boulder (Sufi practice of remembrance) a visitor was speaking about doing holy war with the ego.  He said that he has been studying the poems of Rumi for years and that he loved a poem that spoke of the ego as the donkey that Christ rode into Jerusalem.  What came to me to be shared, I wish to share with you, as well.  Yes, the ego is like a donkey.  Does it take a war or even one battle to tame a donkey?  What happens if you begin to beat on a donkey?  Does he serve you well?  No, a donkey needs tenderness and the honoring of its purpose.  It needs to be well tended so that it knows that it is loved.  This is exactly what is needed by the ego.  Warring with it does not work.  It just gets very sly, like a donkey and bites or kicks when we aren’t paying attention.  If anger arises, do we need to fight it into submission or can we recognize that there is a wound somewhere under the outburst and listen closely, so that healing may occur?  The ego needs to be refined, not battled.  

This week may we remember the donkey and be gentle with ourselves.  Let us remember that we are loved and that we are Love and act in ways that align with that.

 Concentration:  Growth occurs when we begin to allow the disparate part of ourselves to face each other within the tender space of our heart.  Here we find the compassion and mercy alive and well just waiting to enfold the ones who feel separate and left out.  Inner work is vital to our outer lives.  The work happens first inside and later is reflected in our outer world.  Let yourselves enter the heart temple this week and create a place where you feel safe and relaxed.  Visualize it in any way that feels right to you and hold the vision of this safe and sacred space.  When something arises in the inner world, a dis-unity between parts of yourself, bring both parts to the heart and let your innate wisdom work with the situation.  Likewise when something arises in your outer world, conflicts, criticism, judgments, go inside and find the parts affected by this and bring them to the heart.  This is the week of the heart/hearth/home.  Allow this protected place to nourish the beauty that you are.

Kabir, Habiba Ashki. Embracing a New Planetary Consciousness (pp. 72-73). Wasteland Press. Kindle Edition. 

Things are changing.  Something new is dawning and we are being called to step into the new.  Are we ready?  We have no idea how strong we are, how much courage we actually have until we take a step into our destiny.  We don’t need to wait until we are stronger, we get strong by taking that first step and then the next.  Love always wins!

I want to share couple of ideas from Matt Kahn’s livestream this weekend.  

The first is to start each day with a strong intention,  One I see as valuable is: “May I anchor the vibration of Embodied Presence, Optimum Health and healing, Love and Abundance in each new beginning throughout this day in my words, actions and thoughts for the evolution of myself, others and the world.”

Other  things can be added like joy, peace …..   whatever calls to you for the day.  You can refresh this intention whenever you remember throughout the day.

He suggested that we let the world empath our centered peace instead of us always empathing the chaos of the world.  I like that very much.

Another idea is taking five steps to good choices.  Often the ego is afraid it will miss something if it doesn’t choose now.  When a choice is before you ask:

1. What are my options?
2. What feels ‘right’?  – ego would ask “what feels ‘good’?”  This is different.  The ego’s need for instant gratification undermines us in making a responsible decision.
3. Who does it feel ‘right’ to?  Is it the ethics and values of the soul or the righteous ego?  – This is the biggest polarity in the world right now.
4. If it feels right to the ego, what other options could there be that resonate with the higher values of the soul?
5. If there are no other options than the ego’s choice, can I wait for other higher value options to appear before choosing?  If the choice is not clear, it isn’t time to choose.  Wait!  If you are in an abusive situation or in a time of emergency and can’t wait, choose to take a small step toward the highest goal you can see.  Know it is a temporary solution until the ‘right’ opportunity shows up.

There seems to be a feeling of tenseness in my body this morning, a sort of frozen stuck-ness that does not wish to be released. I went to the grocery store early and there was no one there nor on the streets between home and the store. Maybe everyone is feeling this, at least those of us who are sensitive to such things.
Things are shifting. What worked before is no longer reliable. Things insist on being renewed. The things that we have felt sure of, the things we have believed must be brought out and looked at, turned this way and that in the light of day to see just what they are saying to us. Change is in the air and we resist. We long for the known way of walking and yet we know that this way is not possible any longer.
This morning I was reading from a book by Nina Simons called Nature, Culture and the Sacred. I so appreciate her and usually find myself in deep agreement with her. This morning was no exception. Here is a quote from the book:
“ I am stunned by the power of women, and our capacity to heal. Wise elders, friends and mutual mentors among the women I am honored to work with remind me to listen deeply to all my sources of guidance, to seek assistance from nature, from my dreams and intuition, to inquire of my ancestors, and listen for responses, before determining a course of action. This requires me to peel away layers of patterning, of rushing to respond to prove my value through productivity. It requires me to question old and deeply ingrained habits. As I practice composting layers of acculturated learning that I absorbed unknowingly through the invisible water of culture we swim in, I wonder whether I will ever be free of it: I realize I need to decolonize my mind and practice reclaiming and remembering other ways of knowing.”
Yes, our minds have been colonized by the culture we live in. Today let us watch and see what needs to be put on the compost pile. Let’s call for help and support and encouragement in letting go, in releasing these old patterns. Let us embrace the Mystery and open to finding a new way that honors our heritage of deep Earth memories. Bless you.