De-colonizing our mind
by Habiba 2019
My mind is colonized by all the things I think I have to do every day, endless lists, loops of thoughts, some current others from long ago, some practical and others dreamy. There are also ideas and beliefs circling around that attach themselves to situations and circumstances, distorting the reality into something that fits with the beliefs I have taken as my own.
I have discovered that an interesting phenomenon occurs with Mercury and Saturn and the Moon conjunct In the sign of Gemini in the 12th house. When Saturn returned to the degree it was at my birth in 1972 and 1973, I found myself sorting through beliefs that had been given to me, some by parents, others by teachers, many by the books I had devoured throughout my life. I found that so many things that I held to be true were contrary to another bellief that I also honored. “Which one is the Truth or at least the closest to the Truth? I could not settle for less then that due to the influence of the 12th house of spirituality and mysticism. The moon seemed to keep the heart open and expanded during this journey of discovery. Somehow it being in Gemini in the 12th house seems to help keep it from immersing itself in the drama of the moment.
As this sorting continued, I determined that I would work to not pass on any erroneous beliefs to those around me. This required a continuous need for learning. A curiosity that had been with me since childhood reawakened, a desire to know what is Real, what is true. In my younger days, I wanted to understand, I was so sure that someone knew the plan for our existence. I searched and searched, reading about all the different beliefs of religious traditions, reading books about psychology, devouring information in a search for the Real.
In 2002 came my second Saturn Return not long after September 11, 2001, I undertook a time of unwinding myself from years of an intense spiritual path to study and practice, to try to understand what could have caused such hatred. My choice of reading material changed to Noam Chomsky and Howard Zinn. We joined a group of activists in Nederland and brought in speakers to help us to navigate the new information that seemed to us to have suddenly entered our reality. This all led to the Peace and Justice Center and all of their events, to Marion McGillis and Genesis Farm in New Jersey and to Pachamama Alliance and its ‘Awakening the Dreamer’ training.
Still I find myself working to decolonize my mind, to remove the veils of belief that keep me apart from the Truth. This inward journey has continued as I seek to discover anything that is blocking me from the Transparency that I long for. May this journey continue! May it come to completion! Let’s join hearts and hands together as we move on this path of clarity and Truth.
